Who I am to humanity

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Someone who cries and yells frequently, a lot

Someone whose blood is a boiling pot

Someone transfixed with what’s not

I’m violent

I’m bossy, mean

Obsessed with homework,

What I can’t have

I, selfish

I cry myself to sleep

I’m hypersensitive

Agreeing to anything is a leap

If someone screams not a peep

From me that is

You see my feeling big as the sky

Shoot them down with your hunting rifles of words

I just let the harsh remarks fly

Inside I die

I spy

I comply

I buy it

Buy into the lies

I’m a racist and a feminist though no one knows why

I’m incapable of love

I am scared of everything

I can’t sing

I’m Polish but too prou-

Wait slow down

Erase all that

Scratch it out

Burn it so I can feel the affectionate flames that compel me-

I want the ashes of the troubled “perceptions of me by humanity”

Burning in the fiery pits of hell!

This is who I really am

(No rhyme this time)

 

The complete truth

A hopeless romantic,

Who is thus romantically hopeless

I am assertive

No one will be walking all over

Me with their stinky shoes

In fact no one can touch me

Unless well, let’s see

I let them.

Maybe I can’t perform so well

But my memory bank for music and theater

Is phenomenal, swell

I love movies and music and fine dining as well

I am tolerate of all races, religions

I am concerned for the future of the world

I care for others more than myself

I’m a very Polish girl

Loves to see the sun swirl

I’m not afraid of everything

I love nature, simple things

But I’m scared of

Planes, trains

Stalkers, heights

And anything that bites

I fall asleep to my i-pod

Not tears

I’m incapable but of being loved in return which I guess is worse

I don’t buy the hype

I’m not that type

Of Woman

I’m passionate about my hobbies

I have a deep love for the world,

But am on occasion cynical

But Mostly I’m Maria.

I’m completely unsystematic and sometimes nerve wrecking.

I am what I want to be and no one or anything else.

I’m appreciating things while you still can.

This is who I am

Face it embrace otherwise

Turn around and walk away

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Choice

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We have to earn our keep. Keep changing, rearranging, loving, learning, crushing, turning, spinning, frying, trying, multiplying, and eventually dying. Eventually we just had our turn. That is why we make the most of every day. Do what you what. Go the extra mile. Choose your destination, your season of love. Choose what you want to wear who you want to become. Choice is very powerful, and dangerous. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and stagger ahead into the unknown.

Judge Me

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<revisting high school ponderings>

no matter
where you go where you are
people are judging you
your clothes
your make up
your hair
your purse
everything is being analyzed before
you even speak to the person
i noticed as i went to shake someone’s hand
i already judged them as a jock
because they were built and wearing Abercrombie
i thought was not so judgmental
but as the day wore on
i figured out even if I never said it
I was.

And that sucked.
Now when people JUDGE ME
I get mad but realize i was judging the person
next to them anyway

I’m trying to figure out
why we judge people
and why some things get in the
way of ever knowing someone

I struggle to answer

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Listening to this song

“We don’t talk anymore”

I think of you

And realize the lyrics

Hit too way close to home

So I listen over and over

Searching for why I still think of you

We don’t talk anymore

We don’t laugh anymore

But the song says “like we used to”

But we don’t talk at all

Do I miss it? Yes

Do I miss you?

I struggle with the answer

Dreams once with you are nightmares now

I struggle to answer

Do I miss you?

The Summer Letdown: Suicide Squad

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I have a brief thing  to say about this film, and that makes me sad because I looked forward to it all summer. After a few friends said this movie was not that great, I was still heading to the theater excited. The previews looked amazing. Unfortunately, this movie was over-hyped and did not live up to those huge expectations.  This film fell flat for me. I was looking for things I’ve seen in other superhero movies, like Deadpool. Things that are funny, scary, and captivating. I looked for certain film techniques, yes, but I desperately searched for plausibility. This film was not plausible at all. I know, you are thinking, it’s a super hero (villain) movie. However, it was so unbelievable it became unappealing. This film lack those things greatly, but it’s important to say the characters were not the issue. The members of things squad were well cast and the beginning of the movie was amazing. In the end, it blended so many different fragments and called that a plot. Will Smith’s character was on point. Jared Leto as the Joker was brilliant and Margo that plays Harley Quinn was truly brilliant. She was easily the best character. The choice of music in this film was so good, but it seemed that music was unnecessary at some points.I liked the cinematography of this film. The use of the camera in different ways was unique. The plot was it’s undoing. I say, skip Suicide Squad.

At Worse or at Best

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Paris, Warsaw, Rome

Quite Far away from home

Never been on a plane before

My friends think I’m insane.

Traveling is quite an endeavor

Though I’ve never actually never

NEVER

Been past U.S. borders, which are limits,

Two sad words. I hear rather I’ve heard

In my head

Sneak slyly to Europe

Get yourself up from your bed

 

Paris- The tower, the Arc

The Louvre Museum, Notre Dame

But I want to go with you

Not someone like my mom

I would simple as pie, make a plan

Do whatever I can

Sell my books, clothes, sell it ALL

I want to see my hopes rise, not fall

Rise like a falcon from a sycamore tree

Fly me to Paris by 3:00

With you, my male companion

I would ask, you wouldn’t say no

I’d go with you even if we had to walk

to the airport in a blizzard

if I had to duel with an experienced wizard

Or perhaps box an oversized lizard

Just to see if the grass is greener when

You paint it, mixing your own shade by yourself

 

I swear I’d do everything

The packing the cleaning

Dreaming, gleaming

Anything just myself

Pm that plane

No, I’ll travel first class with you,

With coca-cola in my glass

 

Warsaw-

I take you show you things I’ve never seen

Show you where my country bleeds from

The unhealed wounds of a mad man’s past

From the concentration Camps and the world’s largest cemetery are there

On the camp and poof

Suddenly you are hit with it

The cold truth

 

Off to Rome

To visit a dome

To hold your hand

In a foreign land

Just us two SHOPPING!

Dior, Chanel

I demand to see it with my own eyes

Not some “surprise” from a photo album

 

Too see is to believe

I must, I crave with my entire being- to see the world

My heart is now trapped in gallows

Restraints leave me trapped

My mind is zapped of all rational thought

 

I would so do whatever it is they do

In planes

Hold onto my fun by the reins

Me, you, and our favorite musicians and movie stars

We would hold a most lavish feast, an exquisite party for exquisite people

 

I would wear an elegant sapphire dress

Stunning, speechless, the beauty that

Transcends comprehension

I want to see snowflakes upon our arrival

You quickly, gentle place your jacket

Upon my nervous shoulder, the ones your hands calm

Crystals of snow falling upon

Our could-not-be-more-perfect

First Kiss

 

Eventually overcome by sleep

I would escape to the subconscious

Resting gracefully on your shoulders

Gentle yet firm

As I start to squirm you lull

Me back to sleep

I want this European Quest of three cities to be

Best at worst

And Phenomenal at best.