The opposite of another you

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Another you to hug
Another you to hold
Another you to laugh with
Another you to listen to me
Another you to care
Another you to understand
Another you to watch movies
Another you to eat dinner
Another you to peruse bookstores with
Another you to miss
No
I don’t want another you
You left me
You abandoned us
You didn’t care one bit
You went your own way without a second thought
You left me to stare
You left me cold
You left so bold
You hurt me so much
I shivered at the idea of seeing you
I want someone to truly care
I want someone who won’t just leave
I want someone to love
I want someone to kiss
I want someone I will miss
I want someone to be there
I want someone to stay when things are hard
I want someone through think and thin
So really,
I want literally the opposite
Of another you

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I saw you

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After a rough night
My dreams took flight
After a long hard, depressing day
I count on my dreams to take me far away
After pain and tears
After all my fears
After problems and lack of a job
Swallow my life
After all this fills me to the brim with strife
I go to my bed
I wrap around my covers
And instead
Of happy dreams to calm me
I see something else entirely
Through the fog and mist
It was your lips I kissed
Not even in the land of dreams it’s true
I try to escape but I saw it,
I saw you

Ledge, Wings, and Memories

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These poems these memories
They boil up with me
Sending me nostalgically
Into what I want to be
Blending words like chemistry
Expressing my life into an expository
Talking about things
Talking about flying with my pair of wings
Talking about new beginnings
Old endings
The reals and the pretend endings
Talking about acting like yourself
Not like anyone else
I dive off the edge
I smash into the ledge
I brush off the pain
I look for whom to blame
And someone who can tame
The wild within me
Before I turn this into the never-ending story
I’ll sign off, still seeking eternal glory!

A little luck

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My hair’s not frizzy it’s right in place
My mind is dizzy, flying through space
Last night of dreamed of my friend Nate
And beautiful art work we did create
What controls our thoughts and dreams?
What controls our desires and hopes?
It seems mine are too expansive
Because they aren’t coming true
And soon I won’t know what to do
Dreams are the best because they are free
But I feel my dreams slowly trapping me
Job prospects are grim
Romance is nowhere to be seen
So I go to the gym
I try to eat right
I read, volunteer
Then I say goodnight
After word games and tv
Sleep takes over me
Wondering have I tried hard enough
Or perhaps I need a little luck
A little luck to carry me through
And until I find it
Work even harder, that’s what I’ll do

That is my vow

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Collectively, Respectfully, Introspectively
You have to live it boldly
You have to live with vigorous reckless abandon
You have to tirelessly spin
In order to win
Win the race
Take first place
Because nobody knows
What’s gonna happen tomorrow
It may be joy and it may be sorrow
So I will borrow a phrase
From my mind
And remind myself and all of you
That here’s what I’ll do
I will rise up
I will rise like like a wave
I will rise up
In spite of the fear in my heart
I will understand
That what’s at stake is in the palm of my hand
So with vigorous reckless abandon
And deathly precision
I pursue my vision
To be, to live, to love
To be unapologetically whoever I want
And flaunt that I choose
To be happy and to heal that bruise
Of not knowing, I want to live for now
That is my vow

Because I have you

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I could use some loving

The kind that is real and true

I could use some loving

Will it be from you?

I could use some loving and I don’t know what I’ll do

Because I’m fading fast

From that love him once gave me that wasn’t true

There was no love only poison which I drank

I drank down his words

So the lower I sank

Now my mind is blank

Except for thoughts that were untrue

Now I’m a little blue

But I’ll get over him too

I could use some loving

From someone who actually means it

Someone who isn’t just a good fit

Someone who really cares and understands

Someone to hold my face in their hands

And show me real love

Not falsehoods and ulterior motives

Just be gentle and genuine

Be my lover but also my best friend

Only then can we have no end

And withstand any storm

Because our fierce love will keep us warm

Keep us safe from harm

Because it was you that did charm me

Because I could use some loving

And you knew

So you held on tightly and stuck like glue

After all that you are, all that you do

I no longer need anything

Because I have you

As real as the stars

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When will the time come

When will it be true

That I’ve found the one

Who won’t make me blue

Who will take my dreams

And give them flight

Who I will cling to as they hold me tight

When I’m at library

When I’m in church

When I’m at a theater

When I’m on a walk

When I’m hiking

When will it be?

When will I meet you and you meet me?

Will it be tomorrow or today

How will this play out?

I don’t know

But I know you’re out there

In the rain and snow

When I find you

Off to the sunset

We’ll go

Then I’ll have a true muse

Only then once I actually can touch you

When I’ll never have too much of you

Then

I’ll write about you

The great poems with a purpose now

With a subject matter not invented

With one that is real as the stars