Maddening Intensity of Calm and Ease


I leave the car slowly and
I see you, it’s you… and I feel butterflies
I feel a sense of anticipation.
We embrace and we walk towards the restaurant
I feel each step as I walk next to you
It feels natural, like we’ve walked together before
Except we haven’t
We smile and walk up to the counter
Breathe in…
You ask, Do you know what you want?
I say Yes, I always get the same thing.
You glance the menu and we order.
Breathe out…
We wait a long time for our food.
But I feel it.
Standing there.
Glancing at you.
I feel stillness.
I feel calm.
I feel peace.
I feel traquail next to you.
I breathe nice and even breaths. I smile. I laugh.
We talk through the evening and it’s so nice.
I feel calm sipping tea and I listen to you.
I appreciate your casual attire.
It calms me.
I dressed up too much…
It feels effortless being with you.
I don’t feel maddening intensity except I do.
I feel maddening intensity of joy.
Maddening intensity of calm and ease.
Of our first meeting.


It left me Breathless: The Giver


What if what you all along thought to be right turned out to be all one giant horrific lie? That is the unimaginable truth faced by Jonas the main character in the book adaptation of The Giver. The movie was not what I expected. The array of commercials showed a strong deviation from the novel with disheartened me. By the end of the movie, I did not mind for my eyes witnessed something greater than a movie based on a book that is accurate, it showed the triumph of love. At the beginning Jonas says “Our master said I should be punished for what I did. I’ll let you decide.” Having read the book, I instantly had my answer but was suddenly put off by how futurist it was. The apprehensiveness that Jonas experienced in the book was not really there and it seemed overacted. I soon realized that was intention and to show the lack of emotions in the community. For in this community there is no pain. It is made into a seemingly utopian society that Jonas, through his unique job selection discovers is anything but that.

However, the scene where Jonas experiences snow, a sled, and color are such stunning scenes that they move your heart. It makes life worth living to see Jonas so happy. The actor chosen to play Jonas is simply brilliant. I cannot say enough for how he carries the movie. Fiona was well played too, but Asher seemed sinister and I did not like that aspect. This movie begs the question: Does sameness equal peace? When Jonas realizes what else is out there he knows the answer. Meryl Streep does an amazing job of playing a twisted character. She explains to the Giver that “the boy must hold in the pain”. Now we understand the Giver who was the Receiver of memory’s job: to feel all the pain and have actual emotions while everyone else lives a false reality. As for Jonas he says about discovering the memories “I got lost, the good kind of lost.” The Giver gives wise advice saying “Don’t accept the truth just because it comes from someone you respect.” This is a scary thought but one Jonas really must ponder as he goes on in his journey. When Jonas realizes what is about to happen he takes drastic action and the scene where The Giver pleads with the chief elder is so heartbreaking but beautiful. This entire moving is a journey about fighting for preserving love. It left me breathless.

Where I’m From


I’m from corduroy jackets and denim jeans.
Running water and yellow Gatorade.
Sometimes when it rains for the window panes never lie,
I’m from wet sidewalks and damp fur.
If Scrabble is out and music pulses through my heart,
Then you know that’s where I’m from.

On occasion, if thunder and lightening lurk near,
The warm covers of my bed
Along with an old movie are where I’m from.
Warm pizza and Pepsi-Cola,
As well as silent laughter of a close friend are where I’m from.
When you can fall asleep to the cites
Of a fantasy land with a glass castle-
That is me.

I’m from oil paintings of mysterious night skies-
The kind of creases that fascinate my fingers.
The love and joy that I possess flows every so slowly
Onto the canvas before I am even awake.
When the lighthouse I’ve portrayed jumps off the page,
That’s where I’m from.

Every so often Harry Potter casts a spell on my world,
And nothing precious to me can be taken away.
My senses celebrate the magic I nourish them with,
For although they cannot tell a soul, they keep my treasures safe.

I’m from scraped knees and bruised shoulders.
One kiss and it is all better.
Where I’m from, long walks on the beach
Make for pleasant conversation.
“Mine the darkness and see the path you leave behind.”
Sometimes there is darkness in the distant trees,
But when the night sky is shimmering with shooting stars,
That’s where I’m from.

The place where I often dwell is in the front yard with all my flowers.
My lungs praise the October air, and the leaves delight my vision.
Sparkling bubbles from the fountain drizzle onto my body-
That’s where I’m where.