When we meet…

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It’s been only a week since your entered my life.
I like that you joke
You poke fun at things
My heart sings
Because it’s cute
My heart gleams
When you write sweet dreams
Everything is so new
But the one thing that is true
Is that I won’t know
Until I’ve met you
So far you are funny, kind, understanding, and charming
I find my quick feelings of affection towards you slightly alarming
I don’t want to fall too hard to fast
But somehow in my heart, I know you’ll catch me
I hope you are who I dream you to be
When I see you and you see me
I can see you walking towards me in my mind
And I hope a wonderful encounter full of laughter, joy and fun isn’t far behind.

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Late at morning or early at night

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Sometimes it hurts just to speak
Sometimes it hurts just to think
Sometimes it hurts just to utter words

Because it’s been so long
Since I had free reign
And now that I’ll applying to jobs
And interviewing
And rhyming
And joking with guys
And eating large cheese fries
I devise a plan
Shop til I drop

But sometimes
Late at morning or early at night
I ponder and wonder
What do I want?

Fly

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Between all of the awful things that keep happening I hope this is the last. I want the bad things to stop hitting me like a train. My body cannot get over the shock of one before the next one strikes. I need a break. It’s so much to happen at once. My soul is crumbling apart. Happiness, joy, love, and balance are hemorrhaging out of my system and bitterness, angry, and sadness are being sucked in their place. I want the good things back. It’s like when I was a little girl and I was drowning. My uncle got me out of the cold water but not before a good scare. This time the water is colder. It’s deeper and more vast and opaque. And I can’t keep my head above water. It is like there are weights attached to my legs hell-bent on filling my lungs with water and taking me away from Earth. I keep ripping them off but new ones lock on tight. No one can save me. I need to do this on my own. The weights off. And swim fly jump just get away. To happiness, joy, love, and balance.

Sweet lullabies of love

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I pull on my Valentine’s Day sweater with care

The one with different colored lipstick kisses that makes me smile

I paint my nails a deep red

I send out wishes to all my family

I eat my oatmeal

Love my body with goodness

That’s my Valentine’s Day

I am grateful that I have so much love in my life

And one day soon

I will swoon

Over him

And my Valentine’s Day

Will include a romantic dinner

Roses or lilies

And most importantly

Someone that loves me with their entire heart

We will cuddle we will kiss

The won’t be a hint that I miss

We will romance

We will dance

We will appreciate the little things

We will hear our hearts sing

Sweet lullabies of love

Ice, then – Metamorphosis

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It swallowed me
Half of me hates all I am
Hates all that I have become
Who am I?
What happened?
I fell through the ice
Thinner
Until it cracked
I almost drowned
And then hypothermia came knocking
Now,
I just thread water
I just get by
I DON’T WANT TO JUST GET BY
It is only a matter of time before
I fall through the ice again
This time
I know
I’m ready
I won’t fall through
I will be just fine
Getting by
Then I will
Pick up
Move away
Shadow and now
A ghost later
New life
That means more than getting by
So much more
I emerge from the ice
Like a phoenix from the ashes
I am changed

I loved you long before…

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I loved you 25 pounds ago

I loved you two haircuts ago

I loved you before that promotion

I loved you before that car

I loved you before that fancy apartment

I loved you before the degrees

I loved you long before the fanfare

I loved you before everything changed for the better

Because you were the best thing that ever happened to me

Before all these things

I loved you when things were hard

I loved you when life was simple

The moment I laid eyes on you I loved you

And although great change is constantly occurring

My love for you only gets stronger

The fire burns, an eternal flame

Because before you became the person you adore

You have to know one thing:

You were always the man I loved

Ledge, Wings, and Memories

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These poems these memories
They boil up with me
Sending me nostalgically
Into what I want to be
Blending words like chemistry
Expressing my life into an expository
Talking about things
Talking about flying with my pair of wings
Talking about new beginnings
Old endings
The reals and the pretend endings
Talking about acting like yourself
Not like anyone else
I dive off the edge
I smash into the ledge
I brush off the pain
I look for whom to blame
And someone who can tame
The wild within me
Before I turn this into the never-ending story
I’ll sign off, still seeking eternal glory!