Cold, bruised soul
Cold, tired hands
Cold, tired heart
Don’t know which direction to follow
Don’t know day from night
Don’t know if I followed the right star
Cold broken heart
Cold, shattered soul
Cold, exhausted body
Enveloped by your arms
By your heart
By your body
By your soul
Enveloped by your comfort
By your smile
By your eyes
By your overwhelming love for me
We connect into one
Walking these streets
I know these streets
I know where the roads converge
I know where they meet
I walk aimlessly
I walk to the tea shop
I drink slowly
It’s after work
The city is aglow
So I take my time
Everyone feels like a star
I admire dresses, scarves, and hats
I stare at pressed suits and colorful tasteful ties
I stop for an art exhibit
I glance at paintings and statues and more
My mind stirs for hours
Whether on the street
Or in the tea shop
Or the art institute
I love to take my time
Make the day sublime
Grab a dinner by the lake
A solo escape
As I do this
I make sure
To soak it all it
So carefully, cautiously
The Glow we all know
The smile that goes on a mile
The grin for the win
Your eyes, gleaming with surprise
Your mischievous glance, your entire motion a dance
I reach out for an embrace
But you’ve got me beat
You hold me close
On a busy street
You don’t rush me outside
As it begins to snow
You know that I love it so
And I won’t want to go
As we walk the snow covered street
Your eyes meet mine
A private moment, a love divine
And the glow we all know
The smile that goes on a mile
Is the smile only you have
When you look at me
I never thought someone would look at me
The way that you do
You make it really easy
To be madly in love with you
I explain to myself so many times
I won’t miss you anymore
Gotta let go sometime
But since I told myself some many times
And specifically, I wouldn’t miss you
All I have wanted to do since that time
Is kiss you…
When I told myself 1000 times before
I won’t miss you.
I thought telling myself so many times
This one white lie was acceptable, then became smudged with tears
Because trying to not miss you anymore
Is like giving up food or breathing!
I lost count how many lies I told myself.
But now an aged snapshot
Brings the tears blowing back.
That most painful day
Wearing a dress and mask but no one knows
What’s behind it, not even me.
When I told myself an infinite amount of times
I simply won’t miss you
I will dismiss you from my life,
Instead this year,
I told myself so many times to avoid
For that will lead to forgetting you entirely;
You can’t miss someone you don’t remember
But this too was in vain
There are no short cuts, no way to invent a cure for one-sided love.
For telling myself so many times
I won’t miss you was a colossal lie.
Missing you I’ve run my tears dry.
Friendship is maintainable.
But love not attainable
Because I said I won’t miss you
Someone else received your devotion
She gets all the things
Because in trying not to miss your presence
I missed your courtship.
Perhaps the biggest mistake in my life was never telling
You that I simply cannot go a day without thinking about
How amazing we could be.
Instead unfinished sketches of tomorrow sit at my desk tonight.
Of the things I thought of you and the things you think of me
All because I tried to fog you out.
I fell even more deeply in
Now, I think I’ll try being around you without
Giving it all away,
Besides if you loved me
You would have done something about it
Somewhere along the way.
I will still always have a place for you, for missing you
For how even though you tear my life neatly apart,
Your existence is embedded somewhere deep in my heart.
Everybody hates liars
But everybody lies
Does that make us hypocrites?
Everybody loathes death
But everybody dies (eventually)
We simply fear the inevitable.
Everybody hates cruelty
But everyone is cruel
Denial is our worn out tool.
Everyone hates learning
But everyone goes to school
We go because we have dreams and we want to convert into those dreams.
The only thing that would change that
Is if your action your lie, or cruelty shatters, ruins, or crumbles
Someone else or you
And if they forgive you
Well anybody can forgive if they try but not every
Can you forgive yourself?